And last but most important...can I haz one?

Neither of you have talked to me about tacos either, regardless of all my pleas.

That's another similarity.

Are you both like Jennifer Lopez?  Do you both like taco flavored keeses?

I am a strange, malformed hybrid of military excellence and cilantro-flavoured deliciousness.

He is the same, only a civilian.  Therefore, not as important as me.

A mothafuckin' cruise ship full of tacos, bitch.

I don't know.  I think we will have to settle this.  More than likely it's him.  Perhaps it's me.  Perhaps.  Who knows.

I think her music and acting are atrocious.  Though, I would make that booty clap like Madison Square Garden.

What in the name of the Holy Ballsack is a keese?

We haven't had a chance.  If you desire, I shall verse you in all the wonderment that is the world of tacos.  Their construction, the history behind them, and just why they are so damn delicious.  Hell, I will fly to where you are and make you tacos, under the following condition:

A) You find a fat-titted hooker to bring me pork ribs and fellatio on command.

You pay for all airfare, alcohol, incidentals(including things I will break in your home out of spite), and a large dowry for my first born daughter.

C) ...I haven't figured out C yet, but when I do, I'll let you know.

-The Captain of the USS Taco.

I think I prefer pitas anyway.

I've never had a Taco. Should I just get some Old El Paso or something and make it myself? I don't know if I'll actually like tacos, I feel like the crunchiness of the taco will throw me off. How is it different from nachos with ground beef, tomatos, cheese and stuff on top?

Aren't soft-shell tacos just pitas?

Also, here in Canada Taco Bell has merged with KFC, so if I walk into a Taco Bell, I'll always see a KFC counter right next to it. If I'm going to spoil myself, I'd rather take the opportunity to get KFC.

softshell taco's should be outlawed. All it is a lazymans burrito, same ingredients just less folds!

If you are going to make tacos at home, I recommend the Taco Bell brand seasoning mix.  It seems to be the most flavourful.  However, if you are really wanting to delve into the forest of taco making, using your own seasoning is the way to go.  Here's my recipe:

1 tbsp. chili powder

2 tsp. onion powder

1 tsp. each ground cumin, garlic powder, paprika, powdered oregano and sugar

1 to 1 and 1/2 tsp. of salt

Brown yourself up about 1lb of ground beef(I prefer ground chuck, but round will do as well.  I generally do not use lean for this application, you need the fat to soak up the flavor), add about 3/4 cups of water, add your spices, let simmer for 10 mins.  Then, nomnomnom.

I prefer lightly fried corn tortillas.  Pick 'em up at your local grocery store, get a small skillet, heat up a small amount of oil in it, drop in a tortilla, let it fry for a little bit on both sides(so it's nice and crispy, not soggy), then move to a plate lined with a napkin, and throw a napkin on top of it.  Repeat ad nauseum until you have enough shells. 

Do not compare tacos to other mexican faire.  Thats like saying what the difference between a delicious burger made from Kobe beef and a burger made from rabbit shit.

Like jongalt has said, this sounds like a recipe for a burrito or a pita.

And I would think eating this in a burrito form is much cleaner too.

The more I learn about tacos, the less excited I'm getting.

Tacoguy has been here longer than Captaintaco - 1 for taco, 0 for captain.