Bannned for allowing an illegal alien to use your phone to phone home, and also banned for transporting an illegal alien and flying without a permit.

Banned for classifying all aliens as illegal... ET came on an exchange student visa and copped a raw deal cos immigration couldn't phone home to confirm his student status or ascertain if he was male or female cos his thingybob isn't located in the same place.  On his planet, males thingybobs are on their left forefinger, and females just above their right arm... which explains why he frequently liked to tap women on the shoulder.

Banned for pointed barbs at pointless objectification... go throw your hapoon someplace it'll do no harm to wildlife or aliens with longer fingers than your own.

Banned for hope. A), Episode IV was a New Hope, but Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back was far better. , Hoping is to much like trying: Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try.

Banned for such vigilance and observational skills as to notice a typo of enormous/monumental insignificance.... hence thou shalt be visited by the sins of the old geezer and behold a plague of rancid dung beetles of biblical proportions.

Banned for indeed.

Banned for sticking yer left foot in the wormhole.... it was bound to twist and make you wanna shout. 

BTW, do you need a bandaid?

Banned for thinking nothing escapes a black hole... and survive to tell the tale.  Well here am I!!!  My 1st marriage was a black hole and I got out in one piece.... tho only just.  Had I hung around any longer I was at risk of losing my sanity.  Oh, wait!  One can not lose that which one never had.

banned for poor recovery

Banned for excruciating ciecumstances that amount to not much and pyro says......banned for etc.

Banned for stealing the r and replacing it with the e.

banned for twisting and shouting

banned for animal house soundtracks