You know you are addicted to technology when...
You can't sit through an entire movie without having at least one device on your body beep or buzz.
You think of the gadgets in your office as "friends", but you forget to send your father a birthday card.
In computer shops, you eavesdrop on a salesman talking with customers, butt in to correct him and spend 20 minutes answering the customers' questions, while the salesman stands by silently, nodding his head.
You say "digital compression" in a conversation without thinking how strange your mouth feels saying it.
You constantly find yourself in groups of people to whom you say "digital compression". Everyone understands what you mean and you are not surprised or disappointed that you don't have to explain it.
You say "voice number" instead of "phone number" as the majority of phone lines in any house are linked to contraptions that talk to other contraptions.
You back up your data every day.
On holiday, you read a computer manual and turn the pages faster than those who read John Grisham novels.
You go to trade shows and map out your path of the exhibit hall in advance. But you can't give someone directions to your house without looking up street names.
You would rather get more dots per inch than miles per gallon.
You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.
You understand all these jokes.
If so, technology has taken over your life. We suggest you go lie under a tree and write a haiku. And don't use a laptop.
LMAO!!! Ed, awesome seeing you too buddy
Undying, well look on the bright side, your dog is now smarter
Well, technically, my dog is now a cat, and I'm writing this to deliberately start a semantic arguement. To create a two-front arguement, I am in fact a warlock, so it may well be offensive or even dangerous to my sanity if I looked on a 'bright side'. The dark side is definitely for me, so, looking on the dark side, my dog-turned-cat will now cough up furballs.
lol The so-called dark side might have it's appeal, but that wears off with age and as your intellect grows, you'll see it's all garbage
Been there, done that
Tech addicted cat?
No. He's much more interested in animorphing and unleashing a tyrannical reign of muder, crime and mindless killing sprees supported by his own horrifically twisted version of the law over the entire world. That is, if I let him become human.
Translate this!
Warum kümmern Sie, Ihre Zeitverschwendung übersetzen dies? Sie könnte Kontrolle über die ganze Welt inzwischen angenommen worden haben.
No need, I'm sure it's something to do with destroying the world, letting evil reign..or..something.
Dude, you'll grow out of it, I was where you are now, but the fascination with the Devil soon fades away, he's just an idea.. he's not real, and your thought's are muddled because of your age.. you WILL grow out of it..
Although it's hard to see, there IS a bright side.. somewhere, you just have to look for it
Oui mais Dieu n'est réel ou l'autre. Et en outre, le diable est réel parce qu'il parle pour moi tout le temps. Et comme je L'AI déjà dit, c'est mauvais pour ma santé mentale, si J'AI regardé un 'côté brillant'.
You worry more about your computer's temperature than your own.
AAAAAAAH IT BURNS, IT BURNS!!!! Attente, mon ordinateur est surchauffe.
The Undying.
Oui, c'est vrai
Ainsi, dans quelles langues parlez-vous ?
C'mon dude, stop quoting the pea soup barfing Linda Blaire, you're not possessed, you're just young.. and it's not amusing, it's boring to see this behaviour, because I've behaved that way myself.. when I was about 16
I don't think holding a 'Le Mess Noir' would fit in here
If you truly feel you need an exorcism, I'll perform one
Abracadabra.. you're healed... sorry, no time for the whole 'in nomine patris el filii et spiritus sancti' Latin thing.
lol Doc, did you stick a thermometer in the USB port again?
Yeah, I took mine to the doctor when I contracted Jafo's flu... to be sure, to be sure. He gave it a shot of PC-cillin, a couple of aspirin and told it to get plenty of bed rest.
You know you're addicted to technology when ... you load the warhead of your USB rocket launcher with sugar and aim it towards the cup on your USB coffee warmer.
ipay atinlay....
In my USB port. Gak.
Gawd, mate...i be sick....gak. i'm reading the stuff....but it's an effort. thanx for the smiles.
Tailsgirl<------------------------Wincustomize Addict
You know you're addicted to technology when... you keep checking your weather widget every 10 minutes to see if the temp has dropped below 37c.
Even with the air-con on it's stinking hot unless I'm right infront of it.
Correction: official temp here today was 39c.
starkers, do what I do mate!
Put a sock on the clothesline, and check it each morning.
If it's dry, it's sunny.
If it's wet, it's raining.
If it's singed, there's lightening.
If there's holes in it, it's hailing.
* If it's dry... it has been on the line for 4 days
* If it's wet... the nextdoor neighbour is being funny again and threw a bucket of water over it.
* If it's singed... the clothes line is too close to my study and I peeled off a scorcher.
* If there's holes it... well of course there's gonna be holes in it... mrs starkers refuses to cut my toe nails ever since I got on the curried cabbage diet, and I can't reach 'em anymore myself.
hahaha!!!!!! this weather docklet bought to you by starkers
Undying, if you're there, lighten up mate, the world is an ok place
Anythingway elseway? Iway ancay ypotheticallyhay eakspay allway ethay anguageslay ouyay eakspay inway
*sigh* not again
Happy New Year Undying, try to expand your mind a little dear
Are you addicted ...?You Might be Addicted to tech if...
Tech Support calls "You" for help.Someone at work tells you a joke and you say LOL.You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.You have called out someone's screen name while making love to your significant other.You keep begging your friends to get an account "so we can hang out."Three words: Carpal tunnel syndrome.You want to meet a girl/guy and your first impulse is to turn on your computer.you've ever gotten onto an airplane just to meet some folks face to face.you have to get a second phone line just so you can call Domino's.You have ever joined "Si habla Espanol" (Spanish chat room) "just to work on my Spanish."you've ever typed "drinking on AOL is better than drinking alone."you go into labor and you stop to type a special e-mail message letting everyone know you're going to be away.you have a vanity car tag with your screen name on it (oops thats me twice!).you no longer type with proper punctuation, capitalization, or complete sentences.you have met over 100 AOLers.you begin to say heh heh heh instead of laughing.when someone says "What did you say?" you reply "Scroll up!"you find yourself sneaking away to the computer in the middle of the night when your spouse is asleep.you turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know you are online again.you know more about your AOL friends' daily routines than you do your own spouse's.you find yourself lying to others about your time on-line and when they complain that your phone was busy you claim it was off the hookyou have an identity crisis if someone else is using an s/n close to your ownyou would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much instead of the truth (all night online).you change s/n's so much that you have to get your profile to see who you are (identity crisis here).you're broke, your modem burns out and you go out onto the streets to sell your body to get a new one.you open your home to 15 strangers for a week merely because they have computers and cool s/n's.your kids are standing at your side saying "mommy, please come cook dinner" and you would rather type another "LOL"you marry your cyberboyfriend/cybergirlfriend and you both sit at your own computers and chat to each other every night from across the room.you type messages to people while you are on the phone with them at the same time.you won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved.your dog leaves you.you have to ask what year it is.you are doing things more and more that you swore you would never, ever do when you first found chat.you write a letter like this..."dear tom, hiyas! how r u doin well i gotta go bbl!"you name your pets after people with whom you talk online.you smile sideways. you sign on and immediately get 10 messages from people who have you on their buddy lists (::cringe:.you have a map on the wall with red thumbtacks to mark where people you have met are.you look at an annoying person off-line and wish you had your ignore button handy.you bring a bag lunch and a cooler to the computer.your significant other kisses your neck while you are chatting and you think "uh oh, cybersex pervo."you have withdrawal symptoms if you are away from the puter for more than a few hours.you use AOL lingo in everyday life (if you still have one... hehehe).you take a speed reading course to keep up with the scrolling.your buddy list has over 100 people on it.you wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get online before you have your first cup of coffee.you have to inject No-Doz into your butt to keep it awake.you have your computer set up so that it goes directly into AOL's welcome screen.you wait 6 hours online for a certain "special" person to come home from work.you don't know where the time has gone.you end sentences with three (or more) periods while writing letters in pen/pencil.your relationship online has gone farther than any real one you have had.you get up at 2 am to go the bathroom but go turn on your computer instead.you spell things out loud instead of actually saying the word.you don't even notice anymore when someone has a typo.when you enter a room and 23 people greet you with {{{Hugs}}} or ***Kisses***you stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno and lemmeyour voicemail/answering machine message is "BRB, leave your s/n and I will TTYL."you type faster than you think.you got your psychiatrist addicted to AOL, too, and are now undergoing therapy in private rooms instead of at his office.you want to be buried with your computer when it dies...or vice versayou actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted.you can actually read and follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your tv screen at the end of a movie.people say, if it weren't for your super reflexes in your eyes and fingers, you would have long been classified as a vegetable.you dream in text.being called a newbie is a *MAJOR* insult.there is absolutely no interesting chat any room and you are really bored....yet you don't want to leave in case you miss something.you double click your tv remote.you can now type at more than 70 wpm.you think about starting a 12-step recovery group for AOL junkies.you are on the phone for a minute and need to do something else you say "BRB" or "BBL"you check your e-mail and forget you have real mail aka snail mailyou go into withdrawals during dinneryou spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to everyone in a roomyou stop speaking in full sentencesyou have gone into an unstaffed tech support room and ended up "giving" tech support to other AOLersyou have to be pried from your computer with the Jaws-of-Lifeyour last sexual experience was really just a "textual" experienceyou set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check your mail" and while you were there you "just wanted to see who's on"you meet people from AOL in public and have no idea what their real name is, so you call them by their s/n.
You know that Doc is addicted to technology when...
.... he can type up such an authoritive and comprehensive list of being addicted to technology signs.
You know you're addicted to technology when... your New Year's resolution is to save enough durin 09 to buy Windows 7 Xtreme and a you-beaut 26' touch-screen monitor.
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